Things Every Graduate Should Know...

The Grosse Pointe North Graduation went very well tonight despite the inclement weather that forced us inside. We have much to be proud of with the Class of 2009. Below is my commencement address for tonight's ceremony, entitled Ten Things Every Graduate Should Know. Congratulations Class of 2009!

Good Evening Parents and Families, Colleagues, Members of the Board of Education, and, most importantly, Graduates,


I know that when you thought about this night, and its importance in your life, this step on your road to freedom – breaking the chains of high school, this celebration of transition from one phase of your life to another, it’s unlikely that any of you thought, “I can’t wait for Mr. Bearden’s speech. That’s going to be awesome!” Graduation speeches are often not that memorable because they are full of clichés and tired quotes. In fact, in Florida last week, a student named Jem Lugo at Springstead High School had her graduation speech censored because it was too original. That’s right – not enough clichés!

Her speech originally started, "Nobody in speeches ever tells you what you actually need to know in life. They stand up here and gush about these lofty, inspirational concepts that are supposed to make you feel all warm and gooey inside” … Now I don’t know what her speech was going to include that her principal found offensive, but I like her concept. Let’s talk about ten things that you really need to know – Kind of like Letterman’s Top Ten List. To help me out, I would like to ask Josh Franklin and Sean Ireland to come on up to the stage.

1. Everything counts – In life you can’t drop a course and re-take it because you don’t like your grade. Everything counts. There are no “re-dos”. Those spring break pictures you posted on Facebook– they can come back to haunt you.
2. You will make mistakes – you’ll screw up. You won’t be judged by the mistakes as much as by how you react to them. If you trip over the steps on the way up to get your diploma, laugh at yourself, and handle it with grace.
3. There is no such thing as normal any more. In New York City a guy who calls himself the Naked Cowboy parades around Times Square wearing a pair of white jockey shorts and cowboy boots and in New York that’s accepted – in Detroit we buy dead octopi and throw them from the crowd on to ice at hockey games, and everyone cheers when Al Sobotka picks them up and waves them over his head …and that’s accepted here.
4. Common sense is not so common…people who instinctively or through their upbringing do or say the appropriate things most of the time are rare. “Git R Done” is not an appropriate thing to yell out at formal events.
5. Manners will get you noticed – what used to be expected is now rare. If you want to make an impression, say “please and thank you”, open doors for people and generally be polite. You will be remembered for what should be just general decency.
6. If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong. Find what you love to do, and you can figure out a way to make a living at it.
7. Some guy or girl will break your heart. When they do, remember the advice of my 6th grade gym teacher Mr. Richards. Prior to our first middle school dance, he called all the boys over and said – “Listen – if you walk across the room and ask some girl to dance and she says ‘no’, just smile and say “that’s o.k. – you don’t look so good close up…” You’ll bounce back
8. Your Body Will Change – Almost 70% of American adults are overweight, and about 35% of males over 40 and about 10% of women over 40 suffer from pattern baldness. Do the math – if you look around you and there are ten people in your row, remember that at your 25 year class reunion, seven will be overweight and five of them will be losing their hair. Some will get the double whammy. The good news though, is that some of you will get better looking with age – I mean, look at me…
9. Your parents will get a lot smarter - “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.” —Mark Twain
10. Change is Inevitable – Today’s iPod will be tomorrow’s 8 track player. Most importantly, YOU can be the Change you want to see in the world.

I asked Sean and Josh to help tonight because they deserve to be recognized for who they are. They became leaders in our Be the Change movement. They reached out to others, went outside their comfort zones and challenged people to drop their assumptions, stereotypes and preconceived notions, and take the time to really learn about others. When I’m talking with friends my age, we frequently say we wish we could go back to high school knowing what we know now. If I went back to being 17 or 18, I’d have a lot more hair, but mostly I would want to be more like Josh and Sean. Confident in self, giving, committed to a better world. If you’re like me and want people to be more like Josh and Sean, stand up and give them a round of applause for helping today and for really Being the Change.

Finally, Class of 2009, you inspire me. The depth of talent, creativity and compassion seated before me tonight is astonishing. We’re all proud of you, and your accomplishments, but more than that I’m inspired by you. I’m inspired by Jamie Ding who published a scientific paper about things I cannot even pronounce, I’m inspired by watching Allison Liddane play defense, I’m inspired by hearing Ryan Mann play the saxophone, I’m inspired by watching Olivia Stander control a soccer ball like it’s on a string, I’m inspired by the paintings of Brian Muss and the photographs of Christie Caputo, I’m inspired by Samantha Matthew’s leadership, Aaron Lechner’s spirit, Andrew Charnesky’s financial wizardry, Jenny Rusch’s speed in the pool and the way our senior boys basketball players demonstrated that strength is in team and not the individuals that make it up…I’m inspired by Josh Franklin and Sean Ireland who have already started changing the world. I’m inspired by Jem Lugo, a kid I’ve never met from Florida who wanted to make a difference by doing things a little differently. I’m motivated and inspired by this amazing collection of young people – so many incredible stories and accomplishments that I apologize I don’t have the time to recognize more.

In 2034 at your 25 class reunion, when 70% of you are overweight, half are bald, and some of you are both, I hope you look back on your time here and reflect that it prepared you to change the world. I hope in between your hopelessly exaggerated stories about how cool and funny you were in high school, you share tales of how you love what you do, how smart your parents are, and how you’ve made your mark on the world. Thanks for all you’ve done for North, congratulations, now go out there and Be the Change!!